2003-05-14 - 4:55 p.m.
I played a show last night at the Marquee. The girl who booked me told me there were going to be some NBC execs there. I didn't think about it at first because I didn't give a shit. What would they do with me? I don't know how that stuff works.
There were some heavy hitters there: Patrice O'Neil, Jim Gaffigan, Christian Finnegan, Heather Lawless, and Demetri Martin. Demetri's a really nice fellow. And he's genuine. And he's funny.
I started getting nervous being 5th in the lineup. I'm not a comedian. I'm an accordion player. And I thought that I should just play it safe and play my three songs I always play when it's a new crowd.
That was when I started to lose confidence in myself. It was weird. I'm getting more confident in what I do but that night I was lost. I've played some dead rooms before and cleared them but this was really off.
I really fucking hated myself after I played. Why am I fucking playing comedy shows in the first place? But you know what? I should have gone out on a limb and tried out "Timecop" on them. I felt stale with my safe set. I could have killed them.
"Hey, I pullin' out my mediocre shit for you fuckin suits. Let's go!"
I don't know. At least I would have felt good about playing new stuff.
I bought a beer after my set and listened to Patrice make fun of me. He's real funny. He's lucky he's a big man, too.
Lisa, the girl who booked me, said "I'm sorry that was a weird audience."
"Yeah, they were rough."
"I hope it didn't get you down."
"It only makes me stronger," I said as I downed my Bass and headed off to my grilled cheese gig at the Mission.